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Ninjkabat

22 Movie Reviews w/ Response

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Pretty boring

You should probably learn more Japanese before you try to make a movie with it. Although your grammar didn't contain any mistakes, it looks like you just copied and pasted some sample sentences from the Genki-textbook website. I mean "The weather is good today?" "This chair is black?" "I play tennis?" That makes no sense. You are probably relying on the fact that not many people can read or write Japanese, which is a poor substitute for humor.

So, please, work on a good concept before you try to make a movie about it. As it is, this flash is not funny at all, and I'm sure it's just confusing for those viewers who don't speak Japanese. You should work on developing a funny situation instead of taking advantage of people's confussion.

Oh, and on a side note, "Lucky Star" should probably be spelled out in katakana - the alphabet for loaned words. You wrote it in hiragana, the alphabet for native words. Even then, you misspelled "Lucky" by spelling it "raki," when the commonly accepted Japanese orthography is "rakki."

I'm just saying: you should learn Japanese before trying to make a movie in that language. If you want, I can do translation services for you in the future, but come up with a good idea first, and then I can help you translate it.

Konata-Izumi responds:

yatta ne. Also Raki Suta is spelt like that for a reason, it's spelt like that in the anime and used in all the title cards.
suishi shite onegaishimasu

Some things to improve, first and foremost.

Well, I'm terribly sorry to say, but for a first submission, it wasn't very good. Maybe it was alright for a first animation, period, but you really have to be proud of an animation before you should try submitting it to the portal. I know that this doesn't grant you the instant gratification that you seek when you posted this movie, but I'm just letting you know in as nicly, calmly, and eloquently as I can.

So, some things to fix. First off, the audio was out of synch. I don't know why it gets out of synch, but for some reason, it's a symbol of the newbishness of the flash if the audio isn't synched properly. Possibly the culprit is the low frame rate. If the frame rate is higher, there's less of a chance of the audio getting off by that much. So maybe you should experiment with that. Secondly, the actual animation. Flash is an amazing program in that it can take an object in this frame, know it needs to end up somewhere else in a certain number of frames, and fill in all of the steps inbetween, making the movement look smooth. I would suggest playing around with this, because animation that is just a manual change of position every beat is boring. I'm imagining it, and I'm certain that your same animation would have looked 5 times better if it had been motion tweened instead of just doing the choppy, poppy motion.

Third and final thing I have to say: work on an original idea. The banana phone thing has been done to death.

I hope this review was helpful. I intended it to be so.

madcat123 responds:

I will be redoing this one and then re-submiting it. On my computer it worked with music for some reason but i but in on the site and XP

Original, funny, and worthy of the frontpage

This submission is not only incredibly original, but also very well drawn and animated. You did a nice job designing characters that had exagurated characteristics which reflected their personalities. The vandal with the elongated tongue was especially solidly designed.

And the actual animation was very fluid and synchronized well with the audio. It was nice to see the blending of tweening and frame by frame animation that went on throughout the animation. Especially during the fight sequence, for some reason, the hand animations just struck me as particularly well thought-out and excecuted.

You also did a very nice job of voice acting, which I'm sure other people will take notice of as well. It fit in nicely with the stylish animation and music that use chose to use.

Overall, there was very little that could have made this animation any better. This is why I believe it should be on the front page, and why I will not be surprised when I see it there. Good job.

plentymagpies responds:

Thanks a lot, appreciate that.

Very solidly done.

Well, hmmm. You've presented an interesting little submission here. Despite the fact that there isn't really much storyline, so to speak, your character design is enough to keep interest in that character high throughout the whole movie. I think you designed him well, keeping most of the elements simplistic, but giving them a refined and elegant look when they are combined to make the "model" you use for animating.

So good job coming up with a character that's actually original and that keeps the viewers interest. On the artistic side of the submission, you also do some pretty interesting things that, while they aren't new, are very well executed. The instance that stood out to me most prominently was the section of the video where you spliced in real life footage. This in itself is nothing new, but because of the steady camera, relatively high resolution, and pretty fluid frame rate, it doesn't look awkward like other people's attempts to do the same trick.

You also surprised me with the opening "kick" animation. For some reason, your timing and use of the "ease tool" really gave your kick animation a nice solid cartoonish look. It had the timing and feeling of some other classic animators, and so that's why it struck me as extremely effective, even though it's an aesthetic that many people wouldn't normally notice or think about very hard.

So, all in all, you've given us a character that we actually become slightly interested in, and you show that you have skill when it comes to animation/video editing. I would say that's all the makings of a flash that will pass. Don't let my overall score on this review scare you (I'm rather harsh when it comes to that), I believe this submission shows promise, and I actually look forward to what you become capable of after more practice.

Keep up the good work.

Jeiji responds:

Ack! Ouchas! A five? Well I guess I earned it, but thanks. At least I have a good character...And a five for SOUND?!?! NEVER! I COMPOSED THAT BEAT! But thanks for the honest input. It bothers me more when people say they don't like my work, and are all like..."Aww, I don't like it...(retarded voice)." So now I know my strengths, and that I need to start storyboarding again. Thanks again!

I don't get your title for it.

The Aquabats are completely and utterly awesome. I've never said it before, but, "Fiven."

Anyway, on to a more serrious matter: the review. I thought that your drawing style was nice and cute. It was definitely a style all your own, and it shows that you've gotten the hang of how to draw things in flash and animate them pretty well.

The one thing that really wasn't up to par, though, was your lipsynching. The mouth shape didn't at all match the type of consonant or vowel that was being sung at the time, and I think that it has mostly to do with your frame by frame approach to animating the mouth. I find that a much easier way to animate lipsynching is to create a bunch of symbols for reoccuring mouth patterns (like an open mouth for "uh, a, e,"clenched teeth for "ch, s, t," a bitten bottom lip for "f, and v," etc), and then manipulate those symbols frame by frame to get the words that you want.

And another thing that's invaluable is to watch yourself talk in the mirror. You have to see what the shape of the mouth is actually going to look like on a real person before you can make it look good on a cartoon character.

So that's my advice. Once again, "The Aquabats, r0ol, 5en"

xthesnarfx responds:

I know what you mean about the lipsyncing. The ressone I used the fbf mouths is because I think you can get a lot more emotion out of it and you can change it up and make each mouth flow into eachother. As for the tittle I just like nameing things oddly or randome that has nothing to do with the flash.

Nice choice of music

This submission was nice and simple, which was good because it was underscored by a completely instrumental piece of technotronic super radness. I wish something more climactic had been done with the ending of the movie, but the animation was not half bad.

Maybe the audio could have been compressed some more. Actually, nevermind. The Aquabats don't deserve to have their audio compressed.

Anyway, nice simple flash. It is a good way to start out your quest to complete a years worth of flashes. Hopefully you will get better and faster as the year progresses, but I can see that you have a flair for flash, and a good enough grasp to make a good effort at a daily flash.

Interesting idea

Well, the idea is very original, and the characters are simple enough that we understand them imediately. My biggest praise is in your choice of music. It gave the submission a light airy feeling, like it was all in a dream (the white background helpped with that too).

Anyway, the only contructive critisism I really have of this flash is that you don't seem to end the sound file once the animation loop starts over. Besides that, it's a very nice first movie. It definitely shows artistic potential.

boxheadboys responds:

hey cheers 4 the positive review. in response to the music thing it did that but couldn't be bothered figuring out how to fix it as I'm teaching my self as i go. Also I'm glad to hear people liked the music, I whipped that one up myself :)

Yes, very nice.

The graphics are truely par none. Your animation skills serriously need very little work at all. It was fluid, well jointed, and had a good sense of exageration that is missing from so many cartoons these days (I don't mean to disrespect the submission, but it is a cartoon).

The only thing I can suggest is to make the name a little more representative of the character. I'm not saying to change the name (like some previous reviewers), but maybe just add a little more to show that while physically this ninja-esque character is on top of things, mentally he could use some work. All it would take is more of a punchline at the end, something really dumb that he does that would earn him the title of baka (I assume you know it means "fool").

With that, I could see this being a very successful series. Good luck with the future ones. Contact me if you ever decide to add voices, 'cause I'de be happy to do them for you, English or Japanese.

El-Cid responds:

Ya, I'm planning on doing just that. It'll definately be heavy on the slap stick, and the stick slaps.

Thanks for the feedback!

Comeon, guys...

while I agree with the previous reviewer that flash is hard, I don't approve of taking other people's work. The author of tooth worked really hard to make his series, and just because it's a successfull idea doesn't mean it should be stolen.

Star Syndicate makes some other quality work, why don't you guys stick to that and leave the Toof guy alone?

Starberry responds:

are you kidding me he doesnt work very hard on his toons, his drawings are very unstylized, the shading is all automatic gradients, the movies sounds are oddly uncompressed and most of all the jokes are horribly flat. that's the problem i have with it, well actually i wouldn't have a problem with it if it wasn't getting 4.00 scores undeservingly. the high 3s are totally reasonable, but 4.00 and higher? no way, sorry i can't stand it.

Don't get discouraged

This was a very pretty submission. You two obviously have some highly refined drawing skills. But I wouldn't get too disheartened if this submission doesn't make it to the top submissions for the week.

I think it potentially could have made it, but there is one element of your movie that needs improving: the timing. Everything was a little slow and so it felt like it dragged on a little bit. If the opening running sequence was a little shorter, or everything was sped up a little, or the frame rate was higher so that it would look more fluid and we would know the slow-mo is artistic, then it would be a higher scoring submission.

But please continue to practice and make more. You'll get timing down eventually.

sara00kid responds:

yeah my timing is off because i didnt know 12 frames = 1 second, i thought it was 15 frames, my bad :(

A graduate student in Japan, The Ninjkabat is not a very active creator these days. Please use e-mail to contact if looking for voice actors.

The Ninjkabat @Ninjkabat

Age 37, Male

Grad Student / Ninja

Kyushu University

Fukuoka, Japan

Joined on 3/27/02

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